Wow!!! I can't believe it. I actually did it!!! I managed having a ball of a time travelling with my mother across 6 different countries for over a period of two months. This is despite the fact that mom and I have rarely been able to see eye to eye or spend long periods of time with each other.
Sounds impossible even to me... Ask me how I did it and I have no right magical potions to share with you. What I can tell you though is that it has been the most memorable and delightful trip of my life.
When I decided to take off from work and go backpacking to South-East Asia, my mother promptly suggested that she wanted to trod along. I immediately panicked. My mother and I had enjoyed a beautiful long distance relationship but had not spent much time together in years. We are two completely different individuals with different ideologies, perceptions, lifestyle and worldviews.
We landed in Bangkok. I had made no prior plans and solely depended on my Lonely Planet for guidance and direction, which faithfully took us from Bangkok to Phuket to Krabi to Phi Phi islands in Thailand, from Cameron Highlands to Penang to Langkawi to Kuala Lumpur in Malaysia, from Jakarta to Yogyakarta to Mt. Bromo to Bali in Indonesia, to Singapore, to Saigon and Mekong Delta in Vietnam and to Phnom Penh and Angok Wat in Cambodia. We planned things on a daily basis – booked tickets at the last minute, checked hotel and tourist area names as we would be about to get into a new town, went banging the doors of hotels at 4.00 am in the morning, and researched online forums for visa procedure details.
And we did indeed form an odd couple in these white-skin infested tourist areas - she fully dressed with her headscarf, and I in my hot pants - both of us bent upon making the most of the trip. People would tell us that we looked cute with our backpacks – me with the bigger one and her obviously with the smaller one.
I engaged in all kind of activities from learning surfing in Bali to climbing the perilous and world-famous rocks at Railey Beach in Krabi, to paragliding over Phi-Phi islands and enjoying the splendid views from the gondola ride in Langkawi. I even took mom (who is terribly scared of water) for a kayaking trip through dense mangrove forests which frightened me as well but my mother kept braving the roots of the mangrove trees as she steered our kayak.
We went shopping too since it is unthinkable to stop my mother from indulging in her favourite pastime. We bought lamps in Bali, paintings in Yogyakarta, clothes in Bangkok, bags in Kuala Lumpur, footwear in Saigon and souvenirs from everywhere. We bought a travelling iron since my mother refused to go out without her clothes being neatly ironed. We bought lots of different varieties of detergents to wash our clothes with. We bought different kinds of Tiger balm products to apply on our sore limbs after a hard day’s sojourn.
We tried all kinds of massages - Thai, Balinese, Vietnamese, Chinese and Cambodian. I preferred the Vietnamese one though - it was a combination of Thai and Chinese massage. We tried all the exotic foods including the Thai sticky rice with mangoes, Malaysian Nasi Goreng, and the bitter concoction known as coffee in Vietnam.
We took a cruise for Phi Phi and Khai islands, had a rendezvous with Mt. Bromo’s active volcano, discovered the islands of the Mekong Delta in Vietnam, explored history in Angkor Wat and visited the Butterfly Farms in Cameron Highlands.
I guess mom and I emerged as winners - we realized we were an unbeatable team - me with my planning and R&D skills, and she with her negotiating and people handling skills. We both discovered the other side of each other and the fact that we could blissfully co-exist.
We discovered that there was a hidden bond between the two of us that was much stronger and potent than the individual differences that had kept us at an arm’s length from each other so far. An action packed holiday away from the stresses of the daily life was all that was required to bring that bond to life once again.
I learnt to develop tolerance for her religious beliefs, she accepted me in my swimming costumes, I surrendered to the fact that she would not venture out on her own, she gave me the space to check out things she considered blasphemous (like nightclubs). She even abstained from convincing me to get married. She kept the monies and did the accounting, I did the spending. Oh, it was an amazing experience. Looking back, I don’t think I could have had so much fun with any friend. We washed our clothes together, shared the single laptop, pulled each other leg, sang songs, bitched about people around us, and took each others pictures. She was ready for any challenge - carrying the backpack for first time, climbing mountains, walking for hours, rough rides on buses, pillion riding on scooter behind me, talking to strangers. It was a fantasy come true.
I and mom became best friends on this trip!!!
